i want to be a ninja

now, i'm sure we''re all familiar with realultimatepower.net...

no? well go check it out then

ok, now that you're versed in the ways of the ninja totally flipping out and chopping off people's heads, i will tell you that the type of ninja that i want to be doesn't play the electric guitar (not because he couldn't if he wanted to) because he is too busy assassinating people and training himself to become more powerful.

i've given a long and hard look into the depths of my soul. i've evaluated my life and realized that what will make me truly happy is learning the arts of weaponry, hand-to-hand combat, stealth, and assassination.

i mean, jumping from tree to tree, rooftop to rooftop with only a few shurukins (sp?) and maybe a vial of poison to slip into the emperor's wine... dressed in all black... totally knowing that you are the badass of the night and will mess-the-shit-up out of anyone who dares to even think about noticing you.

ninjas are everything that represents awesomousity in this world. when you look into the eyes of a ninja, you see the black void that is the nothingness of true enlightenment. ninja's aren't worried about tps reports or production problems. ninjas would probably slice their accounting books in half like they were made of butter if they were in grad school. and the professor would probably give them an a+ for doing all of the extra credit.

i'm fairly certain jack bauer is an ex-ninja. and the only reason he gave up ninja-ing was to save david palmers's life. he will probably slice the earth in half at the end of this season because he's so pissed that rudy is such a whiney little bitch.

no, but back to serious-land where all the workers/grad students hang out. if you really ask yourself what would make you happy in life. i am positive that your answer will be, "to be a ninja". i mean, that's my answer. i'm thinking of joining the cia or the fbi or something. cuz that's about as close to being a ninja as you can get when you're white. but i mean... that's kinda lame. real ninjas where pajamas all day and all night, not suits...

ahh the life of a ninja.